Over the last two decades, I have had the chance to mother my three bears on Christmas morning. What a gift. In fact, really the only gift I need (isn’t it funny how things change?) In years past, I have sat down with the boys at our kitchen table and we have talked about words that come to mind when we think of our Christmas here at The Smith Homestead. Not the department store’s projected holiday perfection, but rather what makes Christmas uniquely ours. Memories and thoughts we carry with us year after year in anticipation of the season.
Here is our list. Does yours will look much different (or maybe very similar)? I’d love to know.
Advent Calendar – There are some really inventive Advent calendars nowadays. We stay pretty old school with ours (a throw back to my childhood days) and buy the cardboard picture, perforated sort with waxy chocolate behind each door.
Board Games – This time of year is board game season with puzzles, Scrabble and Monopoly being the usual suspects.
Cocoa – Hot Cocoa is not a luxury this time of year, but a necessity in our opinion. For years I knew hot cocoa as Hershey’s syrup mixed with milk and popped into the microwave. That was until my dear mother-in-law introduced me to the homemade version. There are thousands of delicious concoctions, but on a cold winter afternoon, nothing beats the recipe on the back of the Hershey’s unsweetened cocoa box.
Decorated Christmas Paper – One of our favorite ways to wrap gifts is to buy a big roll of brown paper (sold at hardware stores) and let the kids decorate each piece before we wrap gifts. They write notes, draw pictures, use stamps and even paint. Once the gift is wrapped, we tie it with a festive bow. It’s not only personalized and unique but a great conversation piece.
Evergreen – The smell of evergreen might literally be the official smell of Christmas. Although we don’t buy an evergreen Christmas tree (that’s a long story involving a bug infested tree during my year in Mississippi I can tell you about over coffee someday) we do bring elements of greenery into our home with a swag on the mantle and wreath on the door.
Fireplace – It’s a shame every home isn’t built with a chimney. Our fireplace is the center of the home in the winter months and especially around the holidays. Don’t fret if your home doesn’t have one, candles lit on a cold winter night still create that sense of sparkle and warmth.
Gingerbread Houses – Lord help us, we try. The architectural drafts are precise and the baking of the elements looks so promising. And although half of the candy gets eaten before the project starts, there’s still enough to make the houses showpieces. But alas, despite our grand efforts, our gingerbread houses resemble gingerbread earthquake victims. Thankfully, we are able to laugh at this yearly mishap. It’s maybe even become an endearing part of our holiday ritual.
Handmade Gifts –I am a lover of giving and receiving handmade gifts. There are so many great websites, hobby stores and books that making a gift to give has become incredibly easy, affordable and rewarding. Give it a try this year.
Ives – Burl Ives that is. Christmas music starts in October at our house - although Burl Ives' voice is a year-round treat. The library has a great selection of Christmas music and online music sites like Spotify and Pandora will give your house the sounds of the season for hours.
Jars of Cordial- Speaking of handmade gifts, homemade cordial (link here to my recipe) is a great gift that needs no wrapping.
Keepsake Journal – Years ago, I bought a Christmas keepsake journal at a gift shop. Its red leather bound with fancy gold script writing on the front. Each year, I fill out the guided sections it lays out. Holiday visits and visitors, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Christmas Dinner, Special Gifts and Things to remember are what I record. You need not one of these fancy leather bound books to start recording your own holiday memories. Any designated notebook will do.
Linen – Some homes have red and green, others gold or silver. Here at our house, we use yards of natural linen. Linen is so versatile that it makes a perfect material for a Christmas table runner, handmade ornaments and stockings hung with care.
Marshmallows –When the weather turns cold, we turn our attention to deliciously sweet marshmallow (homemade) fluff throughout the winter months.
Neighbors – Christmastime is a perfect excuse to reach out, extend a warm hello, drop off a holiday card and even a gift of cookies to the neighbors around you.
Open House – We spend much of our holiday season at home playing games, baking and staying warm. But we also can’t wait to pile in the car and head out to a few holiday events around town. I’d encourage you to find a few festivities to put on your rotating holiday schedule. The city, local shop owners and restaurateurs are busy this time of year creating atmospheres that boost the holiday spirit for everyone.
Photographs –Don’t forget, photographs are an important part of memory making. Make time this holiday season to pull out the old photo books and take a walk down memory lane.
Quilts – You can’t take two steps into our home without seeing a quilt and each has a story to tell. The fragile ones get draped on the old ladder in our living room while others are used almost hourly in these long winter months. As I sit here typing in my studio, I have two nearby and one across my lap to keep me warm. I love how the older and more tattered they become, their warmth and comfort grow.
Record Player – Last Christmas, our son asked for a record player. He counts Frank Sinatra as his favorite singer, so this gift request did not surprise us in the least. The record player has become a treasured part of our home and this year we’ve been scouring the local thrift stores for some great holiday records to play during the long Scrabble game sessions ahead.
Snowflakes in the Windows – Paper cut-out snowflakes are a Christmas decorating must. We hang the snowflakes with fishing line in our windows, from the Christmas tree limbs and above our kitchen table from the ceiling. It’s such a simple idea but it adds just a little extra boost of whimsy and wonder to the standard holiday décor.
Turkey & Wild Rice Soup – A good soup recipe needs to be a part of every person’s cooking repertoire. When I asked my eldest what words he thinks of when he thinks about Christmas he said “Turkey and Wild Rice Soup.” The recipe was one that just came together one snowy night a few years back and has now become the most requested meal around our family dinner table this time of year.
Upside Down Cake – My mother wasn’t known for being much of a baker, but she could make a pretty stellar Pineapple Upside Down Cake. Around the holidays, an upside down cake baked in a deep cast iron skillet is usually the dessert of choice at the end of a cold day. It’s such a cinch to pull together, bakes incredibly fast, and should (I highly recommend) be eaten warm with a dollop of whipped cream. Click here for my favorite recipe.
Village Scenes – I am a sucker for those ceramic village scenes. Thankfully, I think the wave of popularity passed back in the mid 90’s so I have a plethora of choices at yard sales, thrift store and rummage sales throughout the year. They may be a bit kitschy, but for us they have become a fond and anticipated part of our holiday décor.
Winter Walks – It’s easy to get out and take a stroll on a sunny, 75-degree day. On a gray skied 28-degree day with slushy brown sidewalks, it’s a little less appealing. Nonetheless, we bundle up, take in the neighborhood Christmas decor, the smells meandering from others kitchens, and a friendly chat with the occasional passerby. It also gives us a great excuse to make yet another pot of hot cocoa and snuggle under the quilt when we get home.
Xmas Tree (fake) – Yes, with all of the handmade/homemade hullaballoo I prescribe to, we climb up into our garage rafters and pull down the old boxed Christmas tree year after year. I love to visit homes that have those effervescent evergreen trees though. The smell is remarkable. So if you have one, let me know. I’ll likely be over soon.
Yorkshire Pudding – On Christmas afternoon, I enjoy cooking a memorable meal. The menu always changes but for this special meal, I pull out the “fancy” recipes that stand the test of time. A few years ago, I started making a traditional English dinner, complete with Yorkshire pudding. This year, I haven’t a clue what will appear on our Christmas table, but fingers crossed, it will be deliciously memorable.
Zest – I lived in Florida for a few years and one of my favorite things about winter in Florida was the abundance of citrus. We would step out our front door during the winter months and pick dozens of varieties of oranges, lemons and grapefruits. Now living up north, we still eat and use lots of citrus, especially around the holidays. Each morning I put orange segments in a saucepan with water and a dash of cinnamon and turn the stove burner on low. The smell that permeates the house is undoubtedly, the smell of….Christmas.
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For the recipe, click here ~
]]>Instead, I wonder, “How do you recharge?” My interest and my concern is, in the midst of the juggling act we all do as automatic as breathing, how are we caring for ourselves?
What are we doing (or not doing) to recharge our batteries?
Last week I woke up at 6am, off to the hospital for a (scheduled) stress test. For 15 minutes I had wires coming off of my chest and into a little black box strapped to my waist as the treadmill steadily increased in speed and incline. As a healthy eating, daily exercising, often laughing, spiritually in-tune person, I had a major ‘how did I get here’ moment there in Room 106.
Stress tests and blood work were preceded by far too much work for far too long and little-to-no time for R&R. Yet, the kicker? I actually thought I was doing a pretty great job of self-care, even treating myself to a day at the museum once a month and a hotel getaway once a quarter.
But spending an afternoon in front of an Andrew Wyeth painting while my mind swirled with to-do lists, proposal deadlines and ruminating over the fires to put out on Monday morning wasn’t really recharging. It was working at a different address for the day.
And my quarterly, solo weekend getaways to de-stress with marathon Kardashian episodes and long bubble baths at a hotel really just became two quiet nights to….work. To write. To catch up on my inbox, to map future goals, to skim business books and to set my call schedule for the weeks ahead. Sure, I came back more organized and on-top of things than when I left. But I hadn’t done what I set out to do.
How do you play? What makes you laugh till your belly hurts? What gives you energy? What lifts your spirits and gives you a spring in your step? What brings about proper perspective and reminds you of who you are, without the workplace titles?
In essence, where do you find you again.
When this magazine was birthed I was living a comfortably predictable life in Kentucky with three small boys and a hardworking husband. By all accounts, I was the traditional stay-at-home mom. Over the course of a decade I created a haven for friends and family. We hosted dozens of parties each year under the big maple tree in the back yard. I started a blog to chronicle those milestones in a mother’s journey. I kept myself challenged by upping my domestic know-how and eventually dipped my toe in the world of business by profiting from those skills.
When the idea for CAKE&WHISKEY came to me like an Oprah “ah-ha” moment nearly two years ago, it was unforeseeable how much the skill of adaptability would need to be cultivated (sometimes internally kicking and screaming) if I were to see the idea through.
No longer was my morning coffee the first thing that got me out of bed, as a rigorous schedule that started well before the boys tumbled down the stairs for breakfast became the new norm. No longer was this slightly-introverted girl able to slip quietly into preschool to pick up my son, for national speaking engagements pushed me far outside my scope of comfort. And no longer was I able to devote the same energy to keeping up with friends as nights and weekends became my ‘no phone’ time, allowing me to wholly focus on the four dashing men in my life. Yet, ultimately those adjustments, ever so slight, became the crucial catalyst allowing the potential for CAKE&WHISKEY’s growth possible. Without them, you would not be reading this letter.
This morning I write this from a small hotel room. In the hush of pre-dawn I’m barely tapping the keys so as not to wake my sleeping boys and husband beside me. For the next three weeks this hotel room will be home as we head into the biggest transition as a family to date.
That maple tree that shaded so many parties now belongs to someone else. The neighbors we shared garden bounties and baked goodies with are no longer our neighbors. The life and business we built in a sleepy southern town now needs to be cultivated in a strange new city. Things change in life and business. Malleability becomes a necessity or we break.
By nature, we tend to buck change, even though what we want more than anything in life is to not remain the same forever. We’re funny creatures that way.
As each feature story in this issue came across my desk, the theme of adaptability and, ultimately, resiliency became my take away. Maybe because as I was reading these stories, I was looking deep for my own source of resiliency and strength in this season of life. We do tend to glean nuggets of wisdom where we need it most, don’t we?
CAKE&WHISKEY gives voice to the stories of women who are on a life and career journey. That would, of course, be each of us. The journey, not the destination, is what we relate to, because no one glides through life unmarked. We all face tragedy and heartache and chaos and the unknown. And the messages of women such as Misty Copeland and Annie Kruyer, when read through the lens of your own story, have the power to resonate deeply.
I am certain that we can learn from and champion each other when we understand that every woman we meet in the boardroom, the locker room, the school parking lot or at the negotiating table is likely also adjusting her sails to weather a storm.
I was three days into a conference in Washington DC and was slated to speak to a room of seasoned magazine executives after breakfast. But first things first. Wardrobe.
No-nonsense Banana Republic dress? Check. Conservative heels, not too high, not too flat? Check. A light coat of mascara and under eye concealer to play some “I feel so refreshed from a great night’s sleep” trickery from the stage? Check.
Hair…. Hair…..umm, nothing. An unfortunate wardrobe oversight, for sure, because I have quite the head of long, thick, unruly hair. Twenty minutes until the continental breakfast and I needed to think of something―pronto. My go to style in desperate times like these? The side braid. After a few failed attempts, I got it right. I reached into the depths of my makeup bag for a hair thingy. (What’s your name for it?)
I think you can see where this story might be headed. No hair thingy to be found. After a futile five-minute one-handed search through bags, pockets, zipper compartments and suitcases, a concierge request for a rubber band delivery would be next. When I opened the coat closet and voilà! A satin hanger. And not just ANY satin hanger; this satin hanger had a white satin ribbon bow wrapped around the hook.
With my one free hand (the other holding the end of my braid for dear life) I unraveled the ribbon and, with some pretty spectacular replicating ability, I might say, I tied it around the base of my braid into a perfectly dainty bow.
I looked in the mirror―and felt a tinge (understatement) mortified. Business dress, conservative shoes, ladylike makeup…and white schoolgirl, Pollyanna bow.
Awesome, Megan. Way to be legit among your new peers.
Feeling deflated, I weighed the ramifications of scrapping the entire idea. But time was not on my side and Lord knows I needed that coffee and dry muffin to keep me from a nerve-ridden dizzy spell on stage.
In that moment, instead of panicking, I paused.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
And in those few moments of pause two words came to mind: sweet and spirited.
And I smiled.
With my power suit ironed and my game face on, I had been verging on puking for two days as I prepped to speak to the decades of experience in the ballroom four floors down. But in that moment of culminated anxiety, my little white bow actually became a gift. A reminder of the sweet. The fun. The more lighthearted and less hard-on-myself ways I know I need, especially in moments of “work mode” like these.
The clock was ticking. I turned the Spotify channel to Katy Perry while adding the last swipes of makeup and final touches to my presentation and then jetted to my caffeine and bran.
An hour later, nerves subsided, I spoke to the publication pros, with my white satin bow borrowed from the hotel hanger and bright courage in my step. I was, in essence, silently preaching from the podium what this magazine...this mission…is all about: “blending the serious with the serendipity,” as one reader put it.
It’s so EASY to get wrapped up in the seriousness of business. There’s a reason the term is coined “serious business,” right? The goals, the juggling and balance, the presentations, the proper hashtag usage, a meeting’s productivity or lack thereof and the disappointments over excel spreadsheets. Even our victories can swallow up any bit of joy in a day when we use them only as strategies for reaching the next rung on the ladder.
But when satin bow moments happen, we need to grab ahold of those little gifts of whimsy and wonder. They do come along! Often! You must open your eyes and look for them. Because they have huge potential to impact the course of your day.
Had I worn a frumpy rubber band whose first life was wrapped around the morning newspaper in the lobby, I likely would have been disgruntled with my ‘bad start’ to the day and it would have showed. And I can promise you my smile wouldn’t have been nearly as big from stage, which ultimately gave others a reason to smile after that same late night party we all were dragging from.